Dear Diary,
The same routine goes on. The moment I woke up, he is the one that entered my mind. I don’t know why, but maybe he was in my dreams. School was, well, school. He came to school with his usual glowing face… the face almost everyone knows because, as you know my dear diary, he’s the MVP of the school’s volleyball team. I can’t take my eyes off him. I wonder why. This morning, as soon as he arrived, he borrowed my Math notebook to copy our assignment. Why didn’t he do it at home? He’s so irresponsible. This is the third time this week! While copying, he seemed to notice something in between my notebook. He took it out and began reading it. I thought that it was just a scratch paper, but then he approached me and said, “Nice poem. Was this inspired by someone?” I don’t know what happened but one thing’s for sure: blood crept up to my cheeks. I felt humiliated because I wrote it for HIM. Luckily, I’m not like other girls who fill a notebook with someone’s name. My reaction to this was one that you see in the movies: I WALKED OUT. My heart thumped so fast! Lunch break came. As usual, he was with his usual friends eating in their usual table. Boys are so boisterous. They tease each other like there’s no tomorrow. They’re immature. But still, I can’t take my eyes off him. I can’t help smiling whenever I see him having fun. What kind of feeling is this? Enough drama, continue the story. He approached the table where my friends and I are eating. With a small smile, he sat beside me and borrowed money. I couldn’t resist that smile so I let him borrow money from me. The twist was that I pretended that I was irritated. “Why am I like this when it comes to him?” I asked myself. “I don’t know,” was my answer. Sigh. Dismissal came. I didn’t want to go home immediately so I stayed at school. I walked around the school until I reached the school court. I saw him there, playing the sport he loves with his friends. I looked at my watch. It was curfew time. I hurriedly went outside and waited at the jeepney stop when it began to rain hard. The weather nowadays is so unpredictable! Good thing I’m prepared. As I waited, a familiar figure approached me. “Hello,” he said. “I don’t have my umbrella with me. Would you mind sharing yours?” I agreed, saying “sure” in an irritated manner. That’s how I usually talk to him. I can’t help it. Under one umbrella, as I looked at his face, the face many people love and idolize, I asked myself for the second time today, “Why am I like this to him?” Now I have an answer. I am like this around him because I am ashamed of showing my heart to him. I’m afraid of showing him how I truly feel. I’m afraid of the way he will react once he knows this. One thing’s for sure, I wish the rain would never stop today.
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Dear Diary,
I’m a guy and I know I shouldn’t write in these kinds of things, but I want to remember this day. How do I start? Well, the sun blinded my eyes this morning. Sigh. Another day, another chance to see her again. I fixed my things and got ready for school. I opened my Math notebook to see if I dreamt doing my assignment or not. A moment later, I confirmed that I only dreamt of it and left my ambitions of being an industrious student in my dreams. As soon as I came to school, I looked for a classmate whom I can copy our assignment from. Luckily, she’s there—the smartest girl in school. I always get this feeling when I’m near her…a feeling of not wanting to come near her because of shyness and yet wanting to get her attention. I borrowed her notebook and started copying. I’m very much ashamed of doing this but it’s something I do just to be near her. Can you blame me for that? While I was copying, I saw a piece of paper stuck between her notes. Then I read it:
If I could have just one wish granted,
Then you are all I wanted.
I want to waste time with you,
That even the seconds will do.
That was all that I could remember of it. It was a good poem so I said, “Nice poem. Was this inspired by anyone?” Suddenly, she looked outraged and began to walk away from me. Did I do anything wrong? I hope not. Well, girls have a visitor every month so maybe that’s the reason. At least that’s what my elder sister told me. At lunch, she ate with her friends on the table across ours. My friends were too loud and I avoided being rowdy like them especially in her presence. My friends kept on teasing and bumping me that my drinks fell off my hands. I then had to buy another one. Unluckily, they don’t have extra cash with them. Then I remembered that she’s here and used the opportunity to talk to her. Just to hear her voice is enough. I sat next to her and borrowed money. She angrily gave me one, like how my sister does it. But I appreciated what she did. Now I’m not thirsty. We had volleyball practice after classes and we played in the field. Then it started to rain and that made us stop the game. I decided to go home before the rain falls harder. As I walked towards the jeepney stop, I saw her. She was in a pensive state. I wondered what she was thinking about. If I could only read a girl’s mind, I would know how to approach her properly. She then noticed my presence. What else will I do other than approach her? “Hello! I don’t have my umbrella with me. Would you mind sharing yours?” was what I said. She agreed but she was irritated again. That was the end of our conversation today. Both of us were silent. But I liked it. There was something in that silence that made me feel light. The aura was different from what she showed me the whole day. It’s like she’s happy. I don’t know if this is a guy’s instinct but it’s good. It’s like we feel the same thing. Now I wish the rain would never stop.
